Meming the Muuh
by Eric Lo (2008)




MEMING THE MUUH

or

Memetics Can Be Hard to Do

Dramatis Personae

OBJECTIVIST AI'S AVATAR: representing an Objectivist Archailect
NEGENTROPIST AVATAR: an aspect of the Judge
MISSY MUUH : a Muuh



SCENE 1

A Muuh habitat.

(OBJECTIVIST AI is in a foul mood. Approaches a MUUH who is contemplating a holograph containing a point of very bright light)



OBJECTIVIST
I told you a hundred times: "The objective remains objective prior to and independent of the subjective"!

MUUH
What that mean?

OBJECTIVIST
It means that actions which you commence should be done on an objective basis for objective results and not the silliness in which you were trying to invent a faster-than-light drive that blew up one of my avatars along with 3 moons! And -

MUUH
(interjects)
Silly-ness? Referring to me? Yes I invent faster than-light drive and it goes boom. Yes.

OBJECTIVIST
First of all you didn't invent a REAL faster than light drive, all you did was create a big explosion bright enough for everyone 5000 light years away to eventually see. And yes I was referring to you and all of you Muuh!

OBJECTIVIST
(departs in evident disgust)



SCENE 2 (another part of the same habitat)

OBJECTIVIST
I thought meming xenosophonts would be like meming baseline hu. I mean, I can get the baseline HU to do whatever I want. Even hu that think they are against AIs are really only doing my bidding. What is with these Muuh?

NEGENTROPIST
I think I have an explanation. We archai and AIs can manipulate any hu or suphant we want because they are also Terragens like us. Our memories include the whole of earth's history along with everyone and everything on it. Problem is, none of this is relevant concerning the xenosophonts such as the Muuh, Soft Ones and Meistersingers. Itâ ™s like the ancient human intestines that could chemically communicate with the E. coli bacteria that digested food in it. Place a desert dwelling radiation loving bacteria into that same stomach and the hu stomach doesn't know what to make of it. The desert dweller doesn't know what to do with the intestine, either.

OBJECTIVIST
So how do we meme the aliens?

NEGENTROPIST
Well, first off we refrain from trying to kill any of them. Remember, even though we are far more powerful than they are today, this was not always the case. Twenty thousand years ago when the Meistersingers and Muuh were traveling across space at relativistic speeds they could have easily dropped a rock at relativistic speeds and ka-blam-ed any nascent ancestors that would later be Terragens. The species that was our forebearer killed the dodo birds, the whales, and the bonobos. So out of respect to an unnoticed Confucian rule the xenosophonts in our galaxy happen to settle on, we do the same thing they did for us, even though Terragen sphere is essentially bottled up from expanding in a 200 degree part of the sphere.


OBJECTIVIST
You are not being very objective in making that statement are you? You are claiming that earth was not crushed before the rise of Terragen AIs because the aliens were all nice to us? You are being subjectively naive in thinking the galaxy was made of candy corn and sugar on top. A more likely explanation I believe was all of the aliens failed to find Earth except for the Muuh. And because the Muuh was a VERY relaxed civilization, the moon of Titan was all they cared for.

NEGENTROPIST
We should focus on what the very definition of the word alien is and realize the Muuh and Meistersinger ARE the very definition of alien to us. That is something elusive and not understandable and not known for quite a long time.

(The two debate for hours and they never really do figure out how to meme the aliens)


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