03-28-2024, 10:30 PM
Let's see here...
I'm generally fine with the rewritten article with one possible wrinkle. This sentence:
Ultratech is defined as ultra-advanced technology that can nevertheless be built, used and understood by modosophont tech-users.
I'm wondering where it (and ultratech as a concept more generally) fits in relation to this article.
Looking at them both it would appear that ultratech as currently defined (we've changed this a bit in this area over the years) could also be considered "Low Ground' transapient derived technology or 'low ground transapientech'. In which case should we consider linking the articles together, either in text or via the Related Articles function?
Also, I'm going to suggest we tweak the wording as follows:
Ultratech is defined as transapient-derived technology that can nevertheless be built, used and understood by modosophont tech-users.
This has the advantage of being both more accurate and removing the term 'ultra-advanced' which is both vague/subjective and also represents a case of using a term in reference to a term to try and explain that term (which is generally not a good thing to do).
Moving on to the issue of the 'Daemons of the Trump'. In absolute terms I really dislike having to consider the issue raised since:
a) The article greatly predates the entrance of Trump into modern politics and has nothing to do with him.
b) The title refers to (IIRC) something in Christian theology about the last trumpet sounding on Judgement Day or somesuch. So again, it's not connected to current politics.
That all said, I've also never really liked the title of this article and (much as I dislike the fact) I do realize that in the modern day there are any number of people online just looking for something to get upset over. Removing a possibly source of oxygen for such behavior is probably the better course of action. With both of those things in mind, I would suggest the following:
a) Rename the article to Daemons of Sidene - the first system that was attacked. Update the rest of the article text accordingly.
b) Replace the fourth paragraph:
As to their origins and motives, little is known. It seems they refer to themselves as the Daemons of the Trump; no one in the region has been able to decipher this reference. Ideas concerning their origin include their being Dawn Hunters, Immanentization Crusaders, or an outbreak of the Chaos. A few minor cults have sprung up based on these ships, considering them a form of divine retribution and spiritual cleansing (a relatively standard mythos).
with this sentence:
Ideas concerning Daemon's origins include that they are the Dawn Hunters, Immanentization Crusaders, or an outbreak of the Chaos.
The primary reason for this is that it sidesteps the whole issue of whether or not the Daemons are communicating with their victims or how or what they may be saying or calling themselves. Also - as currently written - there is nothing about these entities that comes across as being even unusually powerful by Y11k standards of military hardware, let alone so powerful as to be considered 'divine retribution' level (whether that is being defined as godtech or literal supernatural retribution). IMHO this brings the article more into alignment with our current take on things and tone of the setting.
That said, if someone is inspired to rewrite the Daemons so they are more 'godlike' in their apparent hardware and actions then we might look at different wording here, including keeping the idea of cults worshiping them and such.
My 2c worth,
Todd
I'm generally fine with the rewritten article with one possible wrinkle. This sentence:
Ultratech is defined as ultra-advanced technology that can nevertheless be built, used and understood by modosophont tech-users.
I'm wondering where it (and ultratech as a concept more generally) fits in relation to this article.
Looking at them both it would appear that ultratech as currently defined (we've changed this a bit in this area over the years) could also be considered "Low Ground' transapient derived technology or 'low ground transapientech'. In which case should we consider linking the articles together, either in text or via the Related Articles function?
Also, I'm going to suggest we tweak the wording as follows:
Ultratech is defined as transapient-derived technology that can nevertheless be built, used and understood by modosophont tech-users.
This has the advantage of being both more accurate and removing the term 'ultra-advanced' which is both vague/subjective and also represents a case of using a term in reference to a term to try and explain that term (which is generally not a good thing to do).
Moving on to the issue of the 'Daemons of the Trump'. In absolute terms I really dislike having to consider the issue raised since:
a) The article greatly predates the entrance of Trump into modern politics and has nothing to do with him.
b) The title refers to (IIRC) something in Christian theology about the last trumpet sounding on Judgement Day or somesuch. So again, it's not connected to current politics.
That all said, I've also never really liked the title of this article and (much as I dislike the fact) I do realize that in the modern day there are any number of people online just looking for something to get upset over. Removing a possibly source of oxygen for such behavior is probably the better course of action. With both of those things in mind, I would suggest the following:
a) Rename the article to Daemons of Sidene - the first system that was attacked. Update the rest of the article text accordingly.
b) Replace the fourth paragraph:
As to their origins and motives, little is known. It seems they refer to themselves as the Daemons of the Trump; no one in the region has been able to decipher this reference. Ideas concerning their origin include their being Dawn Hunters, Immanentization Crusaders, or an outbreak of the Chaos. A few minor cults have sprung up based on these ships, considering them a form of divine retribution and spiritual cleansing (a relatively standard mythos).
with this sentence:
Ideas concerning Daemon's origins include that they are the Dawn Hunters, Immanentization Crusaders, or an outbreak of the Chaos.
The primary reason for this is that it sidesteps the whole issue of whether or not the Daemons are communicating with their victims or how or what they may be saying or calling themselves. Also - as currently written - there is nothing about these entities that comes across as being even unusually powerful by Y11k standards of military hardware, let alone so powerful as to be considered 'divine retribution' level (whether that is being defined as godtech or literal supernatural retribution). IMHO this brings the article more into alignment with our current take on things and tone of the setting.
That said, if someone is inspired to rewrite the Daemons so they are more 'godlike' in their apparent hardware and actions then we might look at different wording here, including keeping the idea of cults worshiping them and such.
My 2c worth,
Todd
Introverts of the World - Unite! Separately....In our own homes.